new every morning

I yelled at my daughter yesterday.

Yep, that's right. This cutie:

And the worst part is, that's not the first time it's happened.

I used to frown upon parents who yelled at their children. "You should NEVER yell at a child! Discipline should come in the form of a firm but calm voice! They need to learn that yelling is NOT ok!" And then I brought this precious baby into my home. And in those first few months, I went through this time that most new mommies attribute to postpartum depression. Except that I didn't give birth to this sweet angel. Which makes me feel that much more sympathetic toward mommies who did give birth. Because if I'd had the hormonal craziness on top of my own craziness, I'm not sure I could have handled it. There were really a few dark moments for me when Natalie was a baby: and she was a GOOD baby. {Yeah. I'm a wimp. I practically had it made, and I still struggled. I digress.} As my teeny baby grew into a 1-year-old, her personality showed up. And it was so cute! And then she hit about 18 months, and her opinions showed up. That's when my patience was really tested. And that's when I found myself starting to lose my temper at times.

If you've raised a toddler before, you probably know what I'm talking about. Deliberate disobedience. Stubbornness. Whining. Oh, the whining. Is that just a girl thing? I'm not even sure where she learned that from, but it grates on my last nerve. Anyway, I realized at some point that I needed some Divine Guidance to help me gain some self-control. Because I don't want to teach my child that it's ok to raise your voice when you're frustrated. But that was what I was doing. So I looked, and I found this:

...His compassions never fail. They are new every morning...

~Lamentations 3:22-23~

OH!! Praise the Lord!! His compassions are new every morning!! Y'all, that means that even though I screwed up yesterday, I get to start over! What an amazing gift from God this verse has been for me the past several months. It's not up to me to control my temper. It's up to me to let HIM control it FOR ME. And when I fail to do that, to let HIM take over, guess what? His compassions never fail. When I mess up & say "crap" in front of my toddler who repeats EVERYTHING...His compassions never fail. When all I want to do is sit down & check my facebook, and my 2-year-old is nagging me to just come BE with her, and I brush her off for "just another minute"...His compassions never fail. When I am lazy and decide to play around or lie on the couch or go shopping, when I should be doing housework or something productive...His compassions never fail. When I constantly think of myself instead of the simple desires of my daughter to just hang out with her mommy...His compassions never fail. 

I need this so much, because on my own, I would fail as a mommy. I fail to remember that she just wants to be with me. Every day, I fail to slow down to her pace. My compassions constantly fail. But His compassions NEVER fail. NEVER. 

They are new every morning. 

What a breath of fresh air for my soul.